i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
