did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
