I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize
