he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
