But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
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