I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
