3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
