my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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