Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Randomize
