ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
i now understand why vodka
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