is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Randomize
