the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
only you would photoshop your dick
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
