shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Randomize
