We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
