Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Randomize
