lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
How does one acquire holy water?
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Randomize
