Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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