the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
