I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
