Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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