I don't think brook has ever known best
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
