He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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