Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
There are leaves in my underwear?
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