you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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