i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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