We're facebook friends in real life
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
Church boner. Awkwardddd
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
