How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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