I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
