Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
