I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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