my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
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