Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
i think my cat just said my name.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Randomize
