If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize