No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I can text with my tongue
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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