You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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