im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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