im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
I need to align my fucking chakras
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
