Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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