apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
