what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
Randomize
