Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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