K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I wish i was in the wii world.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
There are leaves in my underwear?
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
