it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Randomize
