Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
