Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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