yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
