maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
