Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
That reminds me...we need to get swords
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Randomize
