love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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