Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
