if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
